Nobody wakes up
wanting SEO.
They want the phone to ring. Everything else is something an agency invented to bill for. Here’s what small businesses actually want, what they get sold instead, and honest answers to the questions they really ask.
Check my visibility — free30 seconds. No card. No sales call.
Six things. Every time.
We’ve sat across the table from one-van operations and the Fortune 100. The wants don’t change much. Only the vocabulary does.
“I want more work.”
Not traffic. Not impressions. Not engagement. Work. If a number on a dashboard goes up and the phone doesn’t ring, the number is decoration.
“Tell me what it costs.”
Before the meeting. On the page. In pounds. A price hidden behind “let’s jump on a call” is a price somebody is ashamed of.
“Don’t talk down to me.”
Being brilliant at plastering and not knowing what a canonical tag is are not related. The bloke with a van gets the same respect as the CEO, and the same plain English.
“I haven’t got time for this.”
They’re so busy working in the business they never stop to look at it. Anything needing six hours of their week is a thing that will not happen. Ever.
“Just tell me if it’s broken.”
Diagnosis before prescription. Most owners have never been told plainly what’s wrong — only what somebody wanted to sell them.
“I want to own it.”
Their domain, their email, their Google profile, their reviews. Not rented from an agency that holds the logins hostage when the relationship ends.
Diagnosis first. Free.
If the first thing a business wants is to know whether it’s broken, charging for that answer is the wrong way round. So we don’t.
- The Visibility Checker is free and takes thirty seconds
- You get the score and the verdict whether you buy anything or not
- Every price is on the page, in pounds, before you talk to anyone
- Nothing needs a meeting until you want one
- No discovery call to find out what it costs
- No retainer for work that should take a fortnight
- No jargon, no wank words, no talking down
The questions people actually type.
No sales pitch in any of these. Where the answer is “do it yourself, it’s free”, that’s the answer you get.
Why can’t customers find my business online?
No Google Business Profile. A profile nobody has claimed. No website to send anyone to. Or a free email address that makes you read as temporary.
Google decides who appears in local results largely on how complete and consistent your information is across the web. It isn’t a mystery and it isn’t a dark art — it’s a form, and most businesses have half filled it in. If Google doesn’t know you exist, neither do your customers.
In the checks we’ve run across Southend and the surrounding SS postcodes, the single most common fault by a distance is an unclaimed or missing Google listing. It is also the only one on this list that costs nothing but an afternoon.
Find out which of the four it is →How do I get my business on Google?
Create the profile, then verify it — usually by post or phone. Then fill in every field: correct category, opening hours, phone number, service area, photos of actual jobs.
Two things people get wrong. First, they abandon verification because the postcard takes a fortnight, and an unverified profile does almost nothing. Second, they choose a category that flatters rather than describes.
Picking a category you aren’t is one of the fastest routes to a suspended profile. We know because it happened to one of our own listings, and getting a suspension lifted is genuinely painful. Describe what you do, not what you’d like to be doing.
Check whether yours is claimed →Do I need a website for my business?
If you live on word of mouth and repeat work, a properly filled Google Business Profile will carry you further than a bad website will. That’s not the answer a web designer gives you.
But anyone who does find you needs somewhere to check you’re real. One honest page — what you do, where you work, prices or ranges, a phone number, photos of real jobs — beats a ten-page site nobody has updated since 2019.
See if yours is doing its job →How much does SEO cost in the UK?
UK agencies typically run from a few hundred pounds a month to several thousand, usually on a rolling contract with a notice period.
Here’s the part that costs us money to tell you: for a small local business, most early gains come from work that costs nothing but time. Claiming the Google profile. Asking customers for reviews. Making sure your name, address and phone number match everywhere they appear. Pay for help when you’ve run out of free wins, not before.
Find your free wins first →Is a Gmail address unprofessional for business?
Nobody rings to say “we didn’t use you because of your email address.” They just use somebody else. A free address reads as temporary, and on higher-value or commercial jobs it’s often the quiet reason a quote doesn’t come back.
Your own domain and a matching hello@yourbusiness.co.uk is roughly fifty pounds a year all in. It is the cheapest credibility you will ever buy, and you own it rather than renting it.
See what’s available for your name →How many Google reviews does a small business need?
Under ten reviews, most people move straight on to the next name on the list. It isn’t that they doubt you — there’s just nothing to go on.
Volume and recency both count. A steady trickle reads as a working business. Thirty reviews that all stop two years ago reads as a business that stopped. The most reliable way to get them is to ask by text, the same afternoon you finish the job, while they’re still pleased with you.
See your review health →Award-winning. Battle-tested.
You should know who wrote this and why any of it should carry weight.
Why we’re worth listening to — and where we got it wrong
Between us: over 25 years in business, more than ten industry awards, three offices at our peak, and clients ranging from one-van operations to the Fortune 100.
And one very public failure. Outstanding Branding was ours, and in October 2021 it went into voluntary liquidation. We had an offer to buy it and we turned it down, because we were certain the best was still to come. Certainty is not a forecast. That is ours to carry, it is a matter of public record, and we would rather you read it here than find it yourself.
It is also the reason this page tells you to spend nothing until you have used up the free wins. We know exactly what it feels like to be sold something you did not need.
Right. Where do you actually stand?
Business name and postcode. Thirty seconds. A score out of 100 across the only three things that matter — can they find you, trust you, and buy from you — whether you buy anything from us or not.
Check my visibility — free Or check a domain name — freeNo card for either. No meeting for either.
Written and fact-checked by Andy Thorne and Sarah Penn. Last updated 1 September 2026.
Prices and figures verified on that date. If something here is out of date, tell us and we’ll fix it.
Fix it yourself, or have us do it.
Fixed prices. No retainer, no lock-in.
Digital Health Check
Where you’re losing business online, in plain English. No meeting needed.
£9.99See it → Get foundGBP Create, Setup & Optimise
Your Google Business Profile built from scratch and tuned for local search.
£29.99See it → Look the partDomain + Email, sorted
Your own address and a proper hello@yourbusiness.co.uk. Includes a year of .co.uk.
£39.99See it → Do it yourselfThe fix list
Your three fixes with what to do, how and why — plus 40 more keywords.
£29.99See it → Or let OG do itWe do the list for you
Profile sorted, a one-page site built for five keywords, backlink and directories.
£69.99See it → Every monthOG WIN
Agreed targets, guaranteed. Break the agreement every three months if we miss them.
From £200/moSee it →